Awaken or Repeat

"silent characters fill my belly
leaving their footprints and ink marks on the walls of my stomach
I crouch over beside myself with pain ,(so i think),
unable to tell if their dance makes me sick or causes me great joy."

I haven't spoken to you in what feels like decades,
but I have held my ground.
I have rooted myself in the soil of the universe,
to whom we have both pledged our lives.
I have kept my word, and have only thought of myself during my loneliest moments.
I have,
 like you foretold, fallen in love with myself.
This love has come to me like a spirit in the night
and has stolen my breathe and has given me new air.
I have never had vision so clear.
I have never been more afraid to see your face again.
In my infidelity, I have gained the eye of the original I am.
I will finally be able to enter you again, for the first time.
My heart is solid, but my stomach responds, I can hear the drums of your coming.
This song, is not the song of victory I had so long replayed in my heart, this song, is the song of mourning.
Still, I stand, rooted in the soil we so long ago pledged our lives to.
The procession arrives, and our eyes meet as they have in every lifetime of ten million years.
I look in you, to see what is left of our promise and what is left of your heart.
I enter the darkest caves and dungeons  and gracefully pass through the holograms of childhood and yesterday.
I find you,
I see you,
the you 
that is me.
My breathe escapes and enters your lips, 
the drums change their rhythm.
I remain grounded.
we hold our stare.
I see the wounds you have brought home, and you see the neglect I have suffered.
You turn from me suddenly and a deep wail is heard from nowhere.
You continue with the procession, again you deem our love unworthy of stopping,
I cannot chase you, I am rooted.

I haven't spoke to you in what feels like decades
but I have held my ground,
I have rooted myself in the soil of the universe, to whom we both have pledged our lives.
The winds carry the sounds of a far away procession. 
I whisper to your heart, to my heart, to the heart we share,
"come home, here is your home, the war has been fought and won, we only await the victory song....come home and play our song"

Personal

Thank you.

You have made a choice to enter my portal.

This portal is yours alone.

You are stepping foot onto black soil.

This soil, is from whence you came, this soil is from the blackness of space,

and it disassociates from color, beliefs, or status.

You have chosen to disconnect.

Now you choose to reconnnect,

To the I Am of Life.

Wherever Life may land.

May you live it.

amun