The Temptation of The Temptress

I understand that it is not my eyes that captivates you,
it is not my smile,
or the way I look at you directly when you speak,
it is not how I listen to you with intensity, that makes you want to know more about me..
its whats behind all these gestures that make you curious..
Its not the red flesh of the apple that bring your lips closer..its the sweet juiciness that is promised underneath.
The idea of you sinking your teeth into something refreshing is what brings you here..its what has you placing your head on my shoulder..
as I brush your hair..and kiss your forehead..
I am silly I know, I laugh too loudly and get depressed at a moments thought,
I go in-between fighting and being still,
I seem to calculate and let everything fall to chaos at once.
The temptation of my hour isn't what you see, its what you believe I hold for you.
Its what you believe is spoken in the unspoken..the hidden notes in our musical..
you create me as your desire,
you picture me as the juiciest creation,
and I become that...

but, it works in reverse as well..
I am tempted by how open your not..
how you pretend to be so exposed yet there is a closet in your eyes
...I must see for myself ..
I must turn the lock and let myself in..I need to be ripped apart by your secrets..so that I can lick your wounds.. 
That's my temptation.
I want to fall head first into your sins and sadness, into your despair, into your hopes.
The temptation of the temptress..
The temptation of woman..

1:02am July 11 2011

Hey you.
I wanted to give you a simple basic personal blog.
No poetry (on purpose) no hidden code. Just an update on my personal life.
(This is going to be tough)
Well..Today starts my 1000th transformation, I completed my body cleanse and will be waking up at 6 am (5hrs from now) to meditate, drink tea, and go running.
I want to lose like 8to 10 lbs before i get back to New York. Oh yea, Im in Gwinnett County of GA.
I have no lovers down here and really no friends within my vicinty. And it feels good. I need this reset button. So why do i want to do this weight loss thing? because im tired of the food in America, Im tired of smoking pot and being sleepy and working and shopping and partying and doing drugs and laughing and praying and dreaming, and girls and boys...
wooosaa (lol)..im not really tired of it..i just need to restart.

"have we come to far to turn it all back around.." Bilal

So yea. Ive been getting my healthy on..my patience on..my positive thinking on..

and im bored with this blog i started it 55mins ago..and im starting to get sleepy..too many thoughts for this cyberworld.. checkout death/love if u want to see some new pieces
peace
&
goodnight

Breathing Statue

You have been the least of my worries for sometime now.
My ailments have become much more serious.
I am a breathing statue.
Inbetween stone and life
My core once called out for your satisfaction
but now I am suspended in limbo,
a painful position for the impatient.
What are dreams when they are made of stone, and sit in my stomach like heavy rocks, making me sick.
What are dreams if they have only a moment of life in them, given and taken by the passerbys of yesterday.
Has my mother birth me to become only an ornament,
an ornament that dreams.
How terrible.
My life must produce so much more,
My prayers are in your mouth and I await for them to be spoken.
I stand here, waiting to release these dreams from my stone insides, waiting to feel the fullness of life again , waiting for you to open your mouth and say my prayers,
I am a breathing statue, and only you give me life.


*Todays words are brought to you by my feelings. I am inspired by the anxiety of my future and the lives that surround me. Romantic love is the least of my concerns today, I only desire success.  I dont want to  waste even a day of my life. You the people are my inspiration  to not give up, your prayers are my own.
I am a Breathing Statue, I only know I am alive because you look at me, because I dream, and I fear if these dreams aren't given life beyond my stone body, my world will perish.


Dream on..

Support The Artists!!!

It just dawned on me that I know an incredible amount of talented people.
"My artsy friends" are awesome! No matter their vice (acting,writing,dancing,directing,modeling, photography,music,life itself,etc) they all have this element of freedom about them! They refuse to settle for anything less than their dreams. I want to support them! Their motivation and passion, encourages me in my arts! I am going to start featuring artists from all aspects of the spectrum that I know personally!

This brings me to Chris Brook aka Brook. A hip-hop artist from my beloved hometown, BOSTON!!

He is constantly self promoting! And I've even had dreams about him doing great things with his words! (calm down lol)
This 6 foot plus brother has talent! His first single  'Man on Fire' off his new mix tape 'Remember The Fireworks' def deserves to be checked out. His voice is refreshing from that monotone sound that is gaining popularity, but it also carries a nostalgic eastcoast sound to it that the airwaves has been missing! (I'm biased! I'm an east coast chick)

Here's the single!

                                                        http://youtu.be/fybkcOrfVXI

Slept on!

Wow! I'm listening to some of my favorite music!
Yes, I am still a little ddrunk from the night before.
And yes, it's 4:24pm on Sunday.
And yes, I think my boss wants me to come in.
but,

This music is hitting on the 1000!

Here's a link to one of my favorite most slept on songs, from a slept on Album!
Enjoy.

http://youtu.be/XwMoYKJr5nI

                                               

   

Shits and Giggles

Bosh makes me laugh! i mean he really really really!
makes me laugh!
His mannerisms are so dramatic and funny.
Some are speculating as to whether or not he's gay!
I honestly dont care!
As long as he keeps those facial expressions coming!
I will love to watch him play!

So delicate!!

Hilarious!!!

noche

i def need to pay attention to my blog.

im updating at 2 30am
 my time
because i realize
i isolate myself,
 (at times, in different ways)
because the idea of another person accepting me,
or understanding me,
or at the least, trying to know me
is
very precious
and scarce.

i wonder
 if that's how we all feel.

So afraid of genuinely being accepted,
we hide.
wherever we can.

anyways,
good nite.

xoxo